I regret things like hair cuts, lying to people I care about, wasting time on "friends" that I should have known were not worth my trust, allowing ugly people to get under my skin, stressing and worrying about things that don't actually matter. I regret these things, not the decisions I made because of these things.
I started thinking about this because I was watching The Conversation and she always asks people at the end of the chat, what they would like to tell their 14 year old selves. It took me a few weeks but I think I would want to tell my 14 year old self to stop worrying. Oh my, if I
Just before I met my husband I dated casually and just before that I had been in a long term relationship that ended some what badly. We had spent most of high school together and I nearly thought my world was ending when we broke up. Today I am able to wish him all the happiness in the world because I remember one night after we had broken up, sitting at my aunt's kitchen table and she told me that I should stop being sad and be grateful that he showed me exactly what I didn't want in a relationship. I remember that moment changing everything. I had such a strong sense of myself from that moment. I knew what I wanted, what I could tolerate and what I just couldn't compromise on. I met my husband about a year or so later. I slipped a few times during that year and since but I always kept my aunt's advice in the back of my mind.
My husband helped me grow to the woman I am now. I am someone that can be sensitive, bitchy, caring, cynical and incredibly aware of myself and I have been that way for a long time now. I've never thought of myself as someone that needed to be saved. DJ didn't save me, he encouraged me to be the woman I wanted to be. I don't regret the mistakes I made in getting to this point I regret the times I cried over those mistakes. Those tears are wasted tears and I will never get them back. Now I cry tears of joy. Joy for the man I married and for the boy that we made together.